TIPS FOR SURVIVING DIVORCE
Distance
When going through a separation or Divorce, it’s important to give yourself space to breathe and evaluate the situation. In order to do this, you and your ex-partner will most likely need some distance from one another – at least for a little while – before you begin dividing assets and custody. When you feel ready, you can call Family Mediation Station’s 1300 491777 number to arrange a family mediation session for you and your ex-partner.
Grieve the loss
Emotionally disentangling yourself from another person is never easy and you can’t move on from your relationship instantly. You are letting go of a part of your life and your family and it’s going to take time to readjust. Venting to people close to you can be helpful or you may also consider seeing a therapist. If speaking about it to someone you know seems too daunting, call a Relationship Counsellor they are trained professionals who are willing to listen to you and help you through the emotional rollercoaster.
Ask for help
It helps to know that you’re not alone and other people have experienced what you’re going through. You can ask someone who has been through a separation in the past for tips on moving forward and ways to stay positive during this difficult time.
Be civil
You don’t have to pretend the conflict between you and your ex doesn’t exist, but you also don’t need to be aggressive towards them. The more respectful you are, the easier it will be to reach an agreement when settling the divorce.
Accept change
Accepting that life as you know it will no longer be the same can be scary and discouraging – or maybe it’s exactly what you hoped for. Whether you see the separation as a loss or an escape, you are going to have to accept change. The best way to do this is to let go of any expectations to have complete control over what is happening and let it be. You should also focus on your newfound independence.
Reassure your kids
Your family relationship is important.Family life will continue. It’s not just you and your ex who must cope with your split – it’s your family as well. If you have children, it can be extremely difficult and scary for them as well. You know the reason why this needs to happen – your kids might not. It is important to maintain open communication with your family so they do not feel left out in the dark. Give them the support they need to continue with their everyday lives with as little stress as possible.
Set goals
Setting achievable goals will keep you busy and give you a sense of satisfaction when you see your accomplishments. Making lists can be an effective way of keeping focused and maintaining a clear vision of what you want to achieve.
Look to the future
Think about where you would like to see yourself in the future – not just six months ahead. Ask yourself where you want to be in 15 to 20 years – that should help point you in the direction you want to go. When facing significant changes, it can be difficult to see beyond the present. Looking ahead helps put everything into perspective and provides a sense of comfort knowing that eventually, this change will be a mere learning curve. This is again where Family Mediation Station can help. When you feel ready, you can call us on 1300 491777 number to arrange a family mediation session for you and your ex-partner.
